Happy Valentines Day, Little Leo

Dear my precious Leo,

Happy Valentines Day. This day is apparently all about telling the person you love, that you love them. So, my darling Leo, on the one month anniversary of your death, we love you – even in your sleep, you make our hearts ache with love more than I have ever known before.

I have never been prouder of anyone. You have given us so much, yet this insignificant world has not even rewarded you with a simple breath of oxygen. Something we all take for granted, every second of our long lives. Yet, you have made us parents and no one can ever take this away from us.

You have given us hope in the midst of sorrow. I have lived an increasingly cynical life these past few years, convinced of my inability to obtain true happiness – the kind of happiness that watching your children grow, laugh and become mini personalities gives you. For without you, I am not sure I would have the power to keep on seeking this kind of happiness. I know now, truley, what I have been fighting for.

I have fallen deeper in love with your mummy, when I didn’t think I had any further to fall – because of you. Seeing her hold you for the first time is one of my most cherished sights from our time with you. Without her, I would not have you. We are all one family, Leo.

To whoever you may have been, we would have cherished you. You would have been so loved by those around you. Popular, but worthy of it. Polite, kind, humble. Proud, strong, quietly confident. Healthy, determined, honest. You would have received many Valentines Cards and whoever you decided to grow old with, they would have fierce competition to love you more than we do.

A world full of love Leo, for you. If only you stayed.

My darling Leo, you will never know. For there are no words adequate enough to tell you how much you are loved. And will be loved. Until we are one family, again, Leo.

Happy Valentines,

Your mum xx

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