So, a little while ago I opened up my blog to an 'Ask Me Anything' on the ins and outs of lesbian parenting... and finally I'm going to write it (newborn life, eh). Through the years, many people have asked us questions (apologetically) about our chosen route to parenting. Since Eli has been born, a … Continue reading Q and A on Lesbians becoming Parents
Today, is our due date. The due date of the baby we miscarried in summer, of our flicker of hope, of our little Robin. I didn't actually remember until mid morning. Or at least I didn't really click that it was the 23rd until mid morning. I'd known that this date was approaching. It's a … Continue reading On the Due Date of the Baby We Miscarried
The charity, Tommys, means so much to us. In the darkest days, we discovered them and their desire to fight baby loss and they gave us so much hope. Hope for a future after stillbirth, for the potential of bringing home a breathing baby, for surviving. I can't really put into words exactly what Tommy's … Continue reading Tommy’s Awards : Mum’s Voice, a celebration of a year of Leo
During our last cycle, I wrote. Not publically, but I still needed to write. I needed to dump all the thoughts, anxieties and what ifs somewhere. Whilst we are still contemplating our moves forward on our journey of bringing home a living baby, I thought I'd share the unedited inner workings of my mind - … Continue reading The Rambling Thoughts of Fertility Treamtent After Loss
Its quite a natural thing in human nature to compare an experience that someone has, to one of your own. It makes you feel included, similar, able to offer support and advice. Some do it more often than others, some just sit and listen and wish not to compare. Some do have similar experiences, that are … Continue reading Why Leo Dying is Not the Same as Trying To Conceive
This afternoon, we went back to the fertility clinic to debrief our most recent cycle. Part of that involves discussing the plan going forward. Or at least what the options are. For some reason, I don't really know what the best plan forward is. Its probably got something to do with the fact that we … Continue reading To Medicate or Not to Medicate, That Is the Question.
Almost four years ago, we bought an Olympic bib set in a discount sale opposite the Olympic stadium. September 2012. About the same time that we started looking into fertility treatment. A year later, that bib set then haunted me as we went on to "fail" our first, then second, then third cycle of IUI. … Continue reading Why Five?
Okay, I made the absolute mistake of first, watching Good Morning Britain and second, Victoria Derbyshire. GMB is just Daily Mail sensationalism on TV. No wonder Piers Morgan is on there. Derbyshire is much more balanced, but only if they have intelligent people on. So, a fertility doctor (Geeta Nargund) was discussing fertility education in … Continue reading Educating Fertility
Now, after Leo died we said that we would try again, eventually. We also said when we were pregnant that we would at least give our two frozen embryos a shot - we couldn't leave them.
Other people's success is just a reminder that someone else is getting the life that you want. That you are striving for. Longing for. Crying yourself to sleep for.