I guess I should start by saying that if the title of this blog looks at all distressing to you, or you aren't in the best frame of minds or places right now - you might want to step away from the triggers. This isn't the cheeriest of posts. On Monday, we miscarried. I was 6 … Continue reading What if You Miscarry your Rainbow?
The pain is heavy. It is physical. It is sitting on my chest. The weight of forever taking my breath. I don't just miss my baby boy. This isn't just a pregnancy loss. I miss all of the Leo's. I miss the inconsistent sleeper, the newborn crier, the fussy eater. I miss the cheeky smiler, … Continue reading I Miss All Of The Leo’s
This morning, I watched an interview of a woman who was one of Jimmy Saville's victims, on Victoria Derbyshire. It was in the lead up to a BBC documentary on tonight. I have put it on to record, it will no doubt be harrowing. The woman in the interview was inspiring and so much of … Continue reading Learning Lessons
We are in a subdued state of blur. Almost unfeeling. Somewhat settled. Somewhat unnerved. Somewhat lost again. Derailed. Back at the beginning. Also, at some small sense of peace.
Our moto has always been : Whatever Tomorrow Brings and it is so much more poignant with every shitty tomorrow that comes our way.
The more the world moves on, and we don't, you begin to feel even more isolated and disconnected from everything, and everyone, around you.
Last month, I donated and pledged to the 5for5 Challenge. If you haven't seen what this challenge is, have a look here at the story of Seamus and how his family are marking his fifth birthday. Here, to hold myself accountable, is an update on my five pledges on two month since the birth of … Continue reading 5fo5 : Month One
wo months gone, but two whole months with you to love, cherish and share with the world - and that, my little Leo, just makes me smile.
So, it appears we are at the beginning of two stages: firstly, discovering which friends really make the cut, and secondly, putting up with random people's unsolicited advice. Granted, the second is the joy every new parent has to learn to deal with. You smile, go oh really, that's interesting, I'll look into that, and … Continue reading Unsolicited Advice
Sometimes, you get taken right back to square one. Or maybe square three. Today started okay, I had every intention to do a few errands, go for a walk, get outside. And then, out of nowhere, one too many errands is just too much. These errands were only at home ones too. Hardly difficult. I've … Continue reading Mr. Grief