It’s a confusing place to be in the baby loss community, I kind of felt like I didn’t really have a ‘place’ or a right to people’s sympathies. A termination for medical reasons (TFMR) can often be met with judgment, and I almost feel like a fraud when I see people sharing their stories, because they didn’t choose to end their babies life, I did. But I’ve put those feelings on myself - I have been met with nothing but support and love.
The language used in the cases of baby loss is even more delicate. Sally knew this and that’s why she didn’t jump in with medical terminology, telling me ‘It feels different from your previous miscarriages, because it’s not a miscarriage. It’s a termination.’ She knew that I was too traumatised and grief stricken to hear this word.
"No matter what the reason for ending a pregnancy, the way you are made to feel at the time is likely to stay with you forever, we must get it right." Abigail, from @bpas1968 for the #ItStillTakesAVillageBlogSeries
One of the main things that I get messages about, is 'where do you even start with navigating pregnancy after loss?' It was by far the most challenging experience we encountered after loosing Leo - its full of every single emotion and sometimes, they all hit in one day. Its intense, and its bloody hard. … Continue reading Navigating Pregnancy After Loss | An Introduction
Here we are: Two girls who wanted a baby who did all we could, but it wasn’t quite enough for our perfectly imperfect little girl.