It’s a confusing place to be in the baby loss community, I kind of felt like I didn’t really have a ‘place’ or a right to people’s sympathies. A termination for medical reasons (TFMR) can often be met with judgment, and I almost feel like a fraud when I see people sharing their stories, because they didn’t choose to end their babies life, I did. But I’ve put those feelings on myself - I have been met with nothing but support and love.
The language used in the cases of baby loss is even more delicate. Sally knew this and that’s why she didn’t jump in with medical terminology, telling me ‘It feels different from your previous miscarriages, because it’s not a miscarriage. It’s a termination.’ She knew that I was too traumatised and grief stricken to hear this word.